Meet the Brotherhood
We asked some of our brothers a list of questions about their experiences in Delta Lambda Phi, and we invite you to read their responses. We hope that this will give you an opportunity to see how Delta Lambda Phi has changed and benefited those who have joined, and to give you a more inside perspective of our group.
Why did you join Delta Lambda Phi?
I joined DLP mostly to meet new people and make friends in the gay community. Being in a fraternity connects you with so many people and you get long lasting friendships, not to mention the strong sense of brotherhood you get to experience through your membership.
DLP is the only faternity for gay,lesbian,bisexual and transgender students in purdue. As a gay men myself, I feel very related to it so I decided to join.
- Haoyue Gao(gary)
I rushed DLP after hearing testaments from two of the brothers on a panel put on by the Queer Student Union. I decided to rush and then accept pledgeship to become more involved in the student community, the queer community, and to build a diverse social network.
I joined Delta Lambda Phi for several reasons. One of my main reasons is so that I can have that sense of family while I am at school. I have always been a kind of person who love to socialize and be with my friends. With me being in this organization, I have the best of both worlds: phenomenal friends and a fantastic family away from home.
- Tad Wickersham
I was in the process of coming out, and when I went to a rush event, I just felt comfortable and safe. I decided to pledge to become a part of this place, and help in providing the same environment to people who are going through similar situations.
- Mo
I had recently come out to myself, and was cautiously entering my new life, looking for support, friendship, and a safe harbor away from home, as I began to prepare to come out to my family. After the first rush, I could see that DLP was a very special group of people who would be there for me, giving me the courage to take the next steps in my coming out process.
- Adam J. Moore
Being a brother of DLP is a great asset of my professional growth. As a brother I get to work with a diverse group of men to carry out the chapter’s business. It has built my interpersonal skills and I have gained a greater understanding of project management.
It has helped with my communication skills and working in groups of peers.
Joining Delta Lambda Phi has helped my professionalism grow immensely. Having weekly meetings, organizing events, and all communication I do with other organizations and people have been major contributing factors. Without joining, I honestly do not know where I would be in my professional life because I probably would have never actively looked for personal professional growth.
- Tad Wickersham
Being an active brother has given me the opportunities to be a leader in the chapter and also outside of the chapter in other organizations. Being a member of the fraternity has fostered my leadership skills and developed them into something that gives me the competitive edge I need in the real word.
- Andrew Stevens
I think the greatest thing about being a brother is knowing you’ll always have people to depend on. You feel so connected with your brothers and whenever you have a problem and you need someone to talk to, your brothers are always there for you.
The best part of DLP is the bond of brotherhood, and becoming a part of a larger national network. At times the closeness can seem like double-edged sword – there are some people who you just want to walk away from – but ultimately Brotherhood forces you to work through your differences. Friendships can end so quickly, but DLP doesn't let that happen – we have to confront our conflicts and resolve them. It's an astounding lesson in compromise and mediation.
- Mark Davis
DLP is not a big fraternity which means I have much more opportunities to get involved in its operation.
- Haoyue Gao(gary)
One of the best things about being a brother is just knowing that sense of trust you don’t get from just any everyday person. You know that if you need a ride somewhere, need a couple dollars to get some dinner, or just a place to hang out and get away from everything, a brother will have your back.
- Tad Wickersham
My fondest experience should be the fundraising of my pledge class. I thought there was no way for us to get a penny out of other’s pocket. But it was me that looked down upon our ability and effort. Partly due to the support of our brothers,partly due to our hard-working,our fundraising turned out to be a successful one.
-Haoyue Gao(gary)
Our chapter has a tradition of storytelling associated with induction. My fondest memory was my own induction. After the induction, we sat around a campfire, cooked smores, and told stories about where we came from. It was the first time I really shared my own coming out, and talked about how difficult it had been, and there was such a feeling of acceptance and understanding. I knew then DLP was a place I wanted to be a part of.
- Mark Davis
After having a bad coming-out experience, I talked to my pledge class, and they offered their love and acceptance, and walked me through that emotional time.
- Mo
I am going to cheat on this one and give two memories (HA!). One was the initation of my first little brother, and the other is when brothers stand and sing the fraternity song together at national events. The song, which stirs up so many feelings for me by itself, is so much more moving when you sing it with brothers you barely know - its a very powerful bonding experience I never take for granted.
- Adam J. Moore
The countless times of being with brothers and just having a good time. It’s amazing how just sitting around and playing video games can be some of the best times of your life. Its moments like those that I hold dear to my heard.
- Andrew Stevens
Constant support from the brotherhood in good or bad times.
Nationwide connection no matter where you go, there is always a brother in the surrounding area (in general).
Job connection after graduation ( in progress, currently proposed by the National Resources Committee and the National Alumni Association ).
Letting you be who you are and practice on how to accept yourself without fear of judgment from others.
- Chris Christanto
Being at school is always the priority and balancing that and a social life of any type is a challenge. But, if anything, you learn time management skills and you reap the great benefits of brotherhood if you can manage to pull through.
The biggest challenge for me on my journey into brotherhood has been opening up and sharing myself with others. DLP is a platform for personal growth. In that, I’ve had plenty of help from my brothers to refine my social skills.
Being surrounded by wonderful and talented people that encourage your personal growth. Great networking opportunities. An emotional support group. Basically gaining a second family and much more.
Being at school is always the priority and balancing that and a social life of any type is a challenge. But, if anything, you learn time management skills and you reap the great benefits of brotherhood if you can manage to pull through.
The biggest challenge for me on my journey into brotherhood has been opening up and sharing myself with others. DLP is a platform for personal growth. In that, I’ve had plenty of help from my brothers to refine my social skills.
Maintaining effective communication throughout pledgeship was a challenge. The initial frame of mind we entered pledgeship with (every person is for himself) was tough to overcome. Realizing that we as a pledge class were in it together made us get back on track and become a united group, and not just a collection of individuals.
- Mo
What were come of the concerns you had about joining Delta Lambda Phi, or a fraternity in general? How did you handle them?
My main complaint with Fraternities was that they made these cookie-cutter specimens of their members…and I am too much of an individual for that. I found that to be a non-issue in DLP. We are all so different, yet we are bound together by Brotherhood.
- Swen Ervin
The time commitment and Pledge education process can be daunting. However, the reward of becoming an active Brother was well worth the effort.
- Stephen Simpson
A concern was how to deal with the required tasks (for example, being an officer or a member in a committee) and the coursework or any other required academic tasks. Another concern was how people see the concept of “fraternity”. Some persons think that a fraternity is just a bunch of guys having a party all the time. This vision changes when the members work together in service activities, for example.
- Freddie Arocho-Perez
If you have questions regarding the fraternity, always try to ask and get answers from active brothers and NOT from non-brothers.
How would you know that you will not like joining a fraternity just by the stories you hear from people and not actually talking with the active brothers and find out for yourself?
Always keep an open mind since there are always people not happy with you joining a fraternity. In essence, do what you think is right for you AFTER weighing all options (pros and cons).
You may feel intimidated in the beginning by joining a ‘gay' fraternity, but in the end, it is all worth it because you will learn more about yourself and about the fraternity. It is ALWAYS a two-way learning from both parties.
- Chris Christanto
Take a minute and think about why you want to join this fraternity. Do you want to create a strong network of brothers and friends? Do you want to become a leader in your community? What can you bring to the Brotherhood? It’s definitely a great community to get into and you’ll be proud for getting into it and having this opportunity.
- Brad Mathews
The best advice I can give to anyone interested in rushing is just give it a try. We are trying to build a diverse brotherhood; everyone is welcome. We’ll do our best to make you feel at ease, but show us that you are serious. Get to know us all.
Keep an open mind and a positive attitude.
Do not get discouraged if something goes wrong! Brotherhood is such a wonderful thing to experience, but don’t think it’s this perfect entity that will solve all of your problems in life. There will be speed bumps. Although there are some trying times, these are the experiences that will make your brotherhood bond stronger and make you stronger as a person.
- Tad Wickersham
Pledging Delta Lambda Phi was one of the best decisions I have ever made in my entire life, and I believe most of the brothers have this same feeling.
- Sean
It's a lifelong commitment to an amazing ever growing family that you can depend on and contribute to.
Brotherhood seems, on its face, to be extremely theoretical and conceptual. I have, in my DLP experience, FELT Brotherhood. I can say that there is nothing better. I wouldn't give that up for anything.
- Swen Ervin
The Bond of Brotherhood in Delta Lambda Phi goes beyond the Purdue Campus. The shared experience of becoming a DLP brother is reflected when interacting with alumni and DLP brothers in other chapters. There is a sense of comfort in knowing that these men share a common bond with you, even though they may be complete strangers.
- Stephen Simpson
